May 24, Taking Care of Self

At some point in our lives we have to make the choice to take care of ourselves first. It’s not being selfish. We don’t give up kindness and compassion for others, we just turn that inward to ourselves. To nurture our soul, to replenish so we can give. One of my favorite sayings is, you can’t pour from an empty pot. If you are spent, drained, exhausted or feeling depleted, where do you draw from to give to the others in your life?

As I was telling a friend about the incessant rain and wind and being cold, having to stay indoors, she said it sounded like a forced isolation. No internet, no Wi-Fi,  no t.v. and only one radio station. I reminded her that I chose to be here. No one else made this decision for me and I can leave at anytime. I made the choice to do this journey by myself. To sit on a bluff or walk the beach just to watch the waves come and go. To watch the birds, to examine the tide pools teeming with life.

Without those distractions I am able to connect with the people around me more openly. To give them more of me and to receive more from them. As I have gotten to know one of the other volunteers here, I discover we have many common interests. One of them is our love of fiber. She is a spinner, weaver and knitter and is happy to share her knowledge. She is teaching me how to spin yarn on a drop spindle! And I learned where the term spinster came from, and I might become one, but not in the sense of being a lonely old woman who lives alone, but one who spins yarn. From Merriam-Webster; 

When spinster first entered English in the mid-1300s, it referred to a woman who spun thread and yarn. Our earliest use comes from the allegorical poem Piers Plowman: "And my wyf ... Spak to þe spinsters for to spinne hit softe" (and my wife...spoke to the spinners to spin it soft).

Our conversation the other evening, as we sat spinning together was about the lack of modern technology here. I told her if I had access to the internet I might not be sitting there learning this craft with her and enjoying her company. 

We all make the choice of how we live our lives. While not everyone can afford to or even wants to go on a solo journey, it’s my choice. Maybe you dream of doing something other than how you are living in this moment. If so, what is holding you back? What are you telling yourself that keeps you from living what you are passionate about? We also need to remember that change doesn’t happen right away, it evolves. Don’t expect instant results. 

To set the wheels in motion, there needs to be intention, things take time to manifest in life. I kept refining and focusing on what I needed to do to make my dream happen. It was hard some days to have patience. Those days I would sit with sadness, frustration, disappointment and all of their friends. Getting to know them and understanding that those feelings wouldn’t last. 

That’s what this time with myself is answering for me. I wake up every morning grateful for the beginning of another new day. I walk to the beach and shout at the top of my lungs, with arms flung wide, Good Morning World!